Few people really understand the value of a human network, but even fewer understand that networks are worthless if we're not loyal to those with whom we interact.

Unfortunately I frequently meet active but ineffective net workers. Who are they? Without their knowing it, people perceive them as being "only average". Average people sometimes engage in gossip, they sometimes break appointments and they sometimes are too much preoccupied with executing justice when mercy, forgiveness and forgetting is most needed. Their reputation is no better than average people. Being "average" does not foster a network that will work for you. In fact, it will actively work against you!

We need to stand out and make a difference. If we want to build value we need to break human patterns turning normal negative into peculiarly positive. Here's a quote from "The 3 Energies Behind Sales Success":

"A person with poor relationships is mostly too much governed by the desires of the moment. Immediate gratification and pleasure seeking reflects an unstable mind and an impatient attitude that only follows average net workers. These people simply don't have what it takes to be a friend of many. Why is that?

The answer is simple: Human networks are slow, but powerful - they are not built quickly, but one brick at a time. People that build a network bigger than average do so on a consistent basis. They're faithful. They stick to principles and values. Their network grows, not necessarily because they are so much "better" than others, but mostly because they are dependable. They're loyal, and the people around them subconsciously recognize it. External conditions do not shake or budge their fixed determination from previous meetings. Neither inside feelings nor outside weather conditions affect their appointed course of direction. They move relentlessly on a pathway positively predictable to others, making them excellent team players.

	"Outside weather conditions does not affect their weather inside..."

Thus, a person surrounded by people who appreciate them, not necessarily for who they are, but for who they constantly become, have that special power of opportunity following them almost like a magic aura. People enjoy their company! Why? Because net workers (i.e. good people who meet good people) generate opportunities, and 'constant opportunity' is the essence of what business and life is all about.

...when a network is built 'the right and the slow way' it becomes the quickest thing you ever experienced. It will save you, help you, even comfort you in tough times and most of all, enable you to accomplish any worthwhile goal you have set out to accomplish. Truly effective people always build relationships, especially when it appears not to be important."

We've looked at "when a message has power" as well as "when training works". Suppose you've got them both in place. Now the question remains: How can we increase or maintain our power of influence?

Influence was never static. It's always fluctuating - up or down. If we're not taking action to increase our degree of influence, then it automatically decreases. Here's the fact: Most people give little thought to whether what they are doing increases or decreases their level of influence with others. Had they been trained in basic principles of influence, they would have experienced dramatic improvement in being able to reach and convince others.

A good example of such principles is found for instance in Dr Stephen R. Covey's instructions where among other things he talks about "The Emotional Bank Account". The principles are simple and above all practical and easy to apply on a day-to-day basis (listed here). Influence is action. It is doing! This is at the heart of the matter - we either add or subtract influential power - through every single action we take in relation to others. Action is where it's found. Good action increases influence. Poor action or no action decreases influence.

The 3 Energies behind every form of influence are Passion, Connection and Intuition. These three cover the entire spectrum of influence. Whereas Dr Covey's example only covers one of them with the concept of the Emotional Bank Account, all influence stems from these 3 Energies.

From a birds eye view and higher perspective influence is energy. Therefore, the more energy we pass on the greater the influence we will have. Being an energy carrier and energy transmitter makes all the difference. Energy and influence travels upward in a spiral staircase through three basic questions - so basic it's almost hard to grasp:

• What am I trying to achieve?

• Who can help me accomplish it?

• How will I stimulate them to pull the load with me?

These three - and in this order - WHAT, WHO and HOW and our ability to answer them are what decides our persuasive abilities.

1. WHAT relates to our identity. It reveals who we are and what we are about. For instance, research shows how every successful company on average takes seven years to answer this first question.
2. The question of WHO guides us in which people that matter most. Everyone is unique and has equal value, but when seeking to accomplish specific goals and objectives some people are worth spending more time and effort with than others.
3. Asking HOW confronts us with the need to become specific as well as accept that others may know more than we do.

The WHAT, WHO and HOW apply to every aspect of life; personal, organizational, family, politics etc. Only people who know WHAT can be truly effective in answering WHO. Only people who know WHO can be truly effective in answering HOW. Only people who know HOW revisit WHAT with real insight. Constantly working up the spiral in this way is the essence of influence. All else is a subspecies or lesser variety thereof.

The first energy, PASSION, comes from answering the first question of WHAT. The second energy, CONNECTION, comes from answering WHO. The third energy, INTUITION, is triggered by HOW. Energy and influence comes through interactive reflection on the most basic questions we can ask. This is why basic is and always will remain most powerful.

Summing up: Influence is hard work, but most of the influential powers we have are generated much earlier in the process than what people may think. When you call someone, speak with someone or write something 80% or more of the influence you have in the moment comes from preliminary effort - not what causes your current perspiration. Work today to influence tomorrow!